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I'm crazy but I get the job done - I present my most recent Google queries
links
stuff that is awesome Henneth-Annun Story Archive / TolkienFanFiction.com / The Onion / Awkward Family Photos / PostSecret / This American Life / Radiolab
October 2014
 
 
 
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aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Fri, Feb. 10th, 2012 06:50 pm
I present my most recent Google queries

santorum
major arteries
stab wounds
oscar wilde ballad of reading gaol
[zip code] weather
how to remove an arrow
newt gingrich
planned parenthood
types of incisions
does it need stitches?
medieval battle wounds

From which I can conclude:
1) I love fanfic!
2) Sadly I am not writing Rick Santorum/Newt Gingrich/Planned Parenthood fanfic.
3) I hope no one ever looks at my search history.  Ever.
4) Oh well.  Context is for the weak, right?

18CommentReplyShare

dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 12:22 am (UTC)

"Rick," Newt said, gruffly, flushed like a tomato. "It's worse than you know."

"I'm not saying you cheated on me," the smaller man said. "I'm not. Callista and I, we made a promise: we wouldn't care what you did. So I'm not caring about Mitt. I'm not. He can fuck with you all he wants, so long as he doesn't fuck with my PAC."

"No, listen," the ex-speaker insisted. "It's... it's worse than that. You see, I've been thinking about an abortion..."

"What?! But I thought you and Callista - "

"No, not for her. It's... you know I've been gaining a little weight - haven't been able to work it off on the nine holes?"

Silence lasted like a bad day, as two wretched hermeneuts stared and stared, and failed to understand whether that particular shade of purple meant something... "Um... are you saying...?"

"I'm pregnant."

"Call NARAL," Rick said, and picked up his cell phone, hit "speed dial," and handed it to his partner. "Right now."




This is totally your fault, Aliana.

Edited at 2012-02-11 12:26 am (UTC)


ReplyThread
aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 12:35 am (UTC)

I...

What

Um

Silence lasted like a bad day, as two wretched hermeneuts stared and stared, and failed to understand whether that particular shade of purple meant something...

BRB DYING

YOU ARE AWESOME.

ALL CAUCUS DRABBLES FROM NOW ON, PLEASE.


ReplyThread Parent
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 02:30 am (UTC)

Caucus drabbles - ha, no. Although I think we may have found a fandom in which mpreg makes unique, symbolic sense: RPF!Politicians.


ReplyThread Parent
aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 02:53 am (UTC)

Yes. Yes we have.

FYI, most of those search terms are related to the Eledhril/Valacar WiP.

And by most, I mean ALL OF THEM.


ReplyThread Parent
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 03:29 am (UTC)

I figured about 80% of them might be related to one of your Valacar stories. Planned parenthood, Newt, and Rick, though... Gondor's about to learn a whole new level of insanity, I gather.


ReplyThread Parent
aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 04:06 am (UTC)

There's this great scene where Eledhril encounters a particularly noisome orc in a sweater-vest on the Pelennor, and eviscerates him.


ReplyThread Parent
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 05:30 am (UTC)

Because who wouldn't dispatch a sweater-vest that covered in Santorum?


ReplyThread Parent
aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 02:54 pm (UTC)

My thoughts, exactly.


ReplyThread Parent
marta_bee
marta_bee
fidesquaerens
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 04:45 am (UTC)

Good God, Dwim. I didn't need those particular images in my head just now. Getthemoutgetthemoutgetthemout!

On the plus side, this could make reading a half-dozen renditions of Plato on the power of ideas more interesting...


ReplyThread Parent
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
dwimordene_2011
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 05:34 am (UTC)

Believe you me, this was not something I wanted in my head, but Aliana's three-way was far too suggestive.

Spread the Santorum - enjoy mpreg as it was meant to be used.


ReplyThread Parent
aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 03:03 pm (UTC)

I should never have underestimated the power of the "/".

(If men could get pregnant, they'd sell abortions at Walmart. Actually, I don't know if that's true. But it would be pretty funny.)


ReplyThread Parent
edoraslass
edoraslass
Edoraslass
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 02:00 am (UTC)

It's the "planned parenthood" that throws me for a loop. :)


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aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 02:11 am (UTC)

They've been in the news a lot, lately. But, um...not...as a...slash pairing, I guess...


ReplyThread Parent
marta_bee
marta_bee
fidesquaerens
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 04:42 am (UTC)

Santorum is a fairly common entry in my search-list, too. Every time I hear of him doing something stupid, I click that link a few times as an act of civil disobedience.


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aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 03:03 pm (UTC)

Me too! Googling for social justice.


ReplyThread Parent
marta_bee
marta_bee
fidesquaerens
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 04:45 am (UTC)

Good God, Dwim. I didn't need those particular images in my head just now. Getthemoutgetthemoutgetthemout!

On the plus side, this could make reading a half-dozen renditions of Plato on the power of ideas more interesting...


ReplyThread
lindahoyland
lindahoyland
lindahoyland
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 09:30 am (UTC)

I guess my search history is not very different with regard to wounds and weapons!


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aliana1
aliana1
Aliana
Sat, Feb. 11th, 2012 03:04 pm (UTC)

Violent fanfic ftw! ;)


ReplyThread Parent